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It's LET'S TALK MONTH, so, first, Let's Talk about The Talk with a guest blog by Kim Cook. Learn more about her below.
The Talk. Just the mere thought of starting the conversation with your child can send quivers of anxiety through your body. Panic sets in: What if they ask me something I don’t know? What if I tell them something wrong? Aren’t the schools teaching them what they need to know? What if they see the fear in my eyes?
Yes, indeed. What if?
How did your parents approach “the talk” with you?
Take a moment to reflect upon your experience as a youngster. Many parents share their stories about talking with their own parents about sex and relationships— or...
Most men admit it – periods freak them out a little. Is it worth the effort to help them overcome their menstrual misunderstandings? What if they were actually supportive – even low key supportive. We don’t need men cheering us on when we start, or making a big deal about our miraculous monthly, but we DO need men to be cool with it and not stutter or cover their ears when we mention menstruation. How nice would it be for him to grab a box of your favorite fem care products when he sees it on sale? Yeah. We have some work to do.
Sure, we women can continue buying our own stuff and managing just fine, right? But for those men with daughters, it’s actually important to help him loosen up when it comes to lady stuff.
Got 12 minutes? Listen to the RadioMD podcast as Dr. Holmes discusses how parents can do a better job talking with their kids about body changes and sexual health.
Are podcasts something you use regularly? If so, let us know! What topics would you like to hear the Girlology & Guyology team discuss? We may just start our own regularly posted podcasts that you can access on YOUR time!
As if body changes aren’t enough, the tween years also bring major changes in moods, behaviors, interests, and the way they think. Suddenly, your child can sling some attitude, text without looking, and argue you to death-all at once! Many of these new “skills” are blamed on raging hormones, but the truth is that most of them are actually caused by all the shiny new neurons and hardwiring going on in your adolescent’s brain.
As recently as a few decades ago, scientists thought the brain was finished growing around age two, and “data entry” was all that happened after that. Today, through advanced medical imaging techniques, we know that the brain begins a second, large growth spurt around age twelve and finishes up in the early...
As a pediatrician/adolescent medicine specialist, I ask questions all day long, including lots of questions about sex and sexuality. By now, I’ve probably interviewed tens of thousands of adolescents. I teach medical students to take sexual histories: always promising confidentiality unless someone’s life is in danger, emphasizing the importance of being non-judgmental and open-minded, and not making assumptions about people’s sexuality. I never asked my sons any such questions because I didn’t want to pry; if they wanted me to know something, I figured they’d tell me or ask me questions.
About five months before my older son was getting married, in the middle of dinner, my wife and I with our two sons, our younger son Noah...
Are you on Twitter? JOIN US for a Twitter Chat as we discuss better ways to talk with kids about sex, sexuality, love and relationships.
Never been part of a twitter chat? It's easy. You can participate as a spectator (and just enjoy the great comments and advice), or you can pitch in and add your own comments. If you see something helpful, give it a retweet or like it! If you have something to add, tweet it with the hashtag #TalkTips.
All you need to do is open Twitter on Thursday, Oct 27 from 3:00-4:00 pm, and in your search box, type #TalkTips or @girlology. Either will take you to the chat where we'll be asking professionals, parents, and young people how to improve the dialogues we have with children about...
As we teach children about their changing bodies, we can’t forget to teach them about what’s happening to the opposite gender. Whether or not your boy is anywhere close to puberty himself, the girls are changing as early as 2nd grade. Giving him a basic understanding goes a long way to help him feel informed, decrease anxiety about what’s ahead, AND improve his support for peers who may be blooming early.
Here’s our list of things a boy needs to know as he faces puberty blossoming among the girls. Let us know what you would add!
- Girls go First. Let him know that girls’ bodies usually start to change before boys’ do, sometimes as early as 2nd grade. Since the first outward sign of puberty for most...
Watch this video to learn who we are, what we do, and how we can help YOU talk about IT.
Every year, I seem to get at least one phone call from a panic-stricken mom with a child in the fourth grade. It usually goes something like this (in a flustered whisper), "Help!! My precious, innocent little [insert child's name] just came home from school and told me that one of her friends told her what sex is.
When I asked her what she was told, her description included words like 'under the sheets,' 'wiggling,' and 'poking.' She seems upset and scared. Now what do I do?!?!"
That's the reality with late elementary age children. There will always be some kids in the class that have older siblings who have shared "the big secret" about sex. Or perhaps there's a precocious child who has developed his or her own...
Songwriter girl camp. I don’t know. It sounded a little too Disney-channel for me. But, it wasn’t for me or even for girlology. It was for my daughter who sings [constantly, I’ll add with a smile] and is interested in the art and craft of songwriting.
So with guitar, hook book, and a hand-held recorder, we boarded a plane for Nashville and headed to Songwriter Girl Camp.
What my daughter got out of it is worth her own blog, or rather, her own song—which you might just hear on the radio one day. What I got out of it is even bigger than that (for me). It was confirmation. Assurance. Another verse for my anthem. My girl anthem. Uh huh. Oh yea. Girl power, girl strength, girl wisdom, girlosophy. I was watching things that I...
Lucky you. 9 is a magical age where girls are growing up and can understand some “adult-ish” things, but are young enough to still have that innocent sense of wonder and awe. Unfortunately, it’s also the age (4th grade is notorious for this) where some kid in her class has already provided their interpretation of what “sex” is – right or wrong.
That means it’s the perfect time to set the record straight and take the opportunity to interject your family values.
We always encourage parents to first ask their child what they already know about sex, because by age 8 and 9, most children have heard something. Ask her if she’s heard the word “sex”? (certainly she has). Then ask her if she knows exactly what it means. This...